Completely Overwhelmed.

Ever been at the place where you have so much to do, it doesn't matter where you start because there's no way in hell that you're going to finish?

I'm three miles past that.

Less of a Woman

After finally putting batteries back in my scales, I was pleased to learn yesterday that I am officially 10% lighter than I was in November.
I'm 90% of the woman I once was...


*happy dance*

When Harry Met Sally

"I'll have the Chef Salad with the oil and vinegar on the side please. And the apple pie a la mode.
And I'd like the pie heated please, and I don't want the ice cream on top, I'd like it on the side. I'd like Strawberry please, if you have it, and if not then I'd like whipped cream, but only if its real, If its out of a can, then, nothing."

"Not even the pie?"

"No, then I'll still have the pie, but not heated."

:)

Sitting on Park Place

Not in the sense that I'm sitting on Money.
(*but we are getting a Great tax return because of all the money we've paid for Ryan's school!)

But I feel like I'm sitting on Park Place, about to advance to Boardwalk. So close to finally having a decision-an answer...

And then, all that's left is pass and GO!

Snow Over it!

I am so ready for some warm weather! We've had snow on the ground for weeks now. Literally. Weeks. And I am officially Over snow on the roads, icicles hanging from my roof, my filty salt-covered car...and the Freaking 27 degree weather that accompanies the snow!

Bring on the sunshine, humidity, and 95 degree days! (I'm totally stocked up on deodorant and sunscreen so anytime now is completely fine)

Insight

Ariana Huffington said that Fearlessness isn't the absence of fear, but the mastry of fear. It's about getting up one more time than you fall down.

I agree.
Fearlessness is staring fear in the face and jumping in with both feet.

Where do they sell life parachutes and flotation devices?

It's Hard To Jump with 1 Foot on the Dock and 1 Foot in the Boat

When Ryan proposed to me, that I KNEW beyond the shadow of a doubt that it was the right thing.

Why can't I apply that feeling to this situation?
It was so simple. I knew that no matter what life would throw at us, that I wanted to tackle it with him. Maybe we were ready; maybe we weren't. Maybe we had enough money; maybe we didn't. Nothing mattered but being married and taking on everything that was to come together.
There was no fear of the unknown. It was the easiest decision I've ever made in my life. I've never regretted it for a moment.

So why is this decision so hard? Why do all the "what if's" matter now? Why, with him by my side, holding my hand, do I second guess everything? Money, time, ability. . . .

How do I find that fearlessness again?
I need to know how I can jump in with both feet.